For the lack of a better term I am using “Mental Issue,” M.I. for short, as a blanket term to describe what we have and deal with on a daily basis. I want to use “Issue” because I don’t want to call it an “Illness.”

Illness, to me anyway, implies that it can be cured, it’s something that you caught and didn’t have before. It’s a part of us, it’s in our DNA, and it’s something we didn’t choose to have but something we live with on a daily basis.

When our M.I. kicks in it’s called “An Episode.” An Episode of what? Are we a sitcom or drama that people sit back and watch? While it may certainly feel this way for non M.I.s, for those of us going through said “episode” it feels more like a storm. Comes on with little to no warning. A lot of huffing and puffing, with loud crashes of thunder. For this reason I will refer to them as Storms and not “Episodes.”

By talking we can begin healing and understanding on both
sides. Ask questions and listen to the answers, don’t judge, don’t speak, just listen.

Sunday, April 22, 2018

The Monster Within

A monster cares not
For the lives he destroys
Their souls I will devour
I am a monster, a very bad boy.
Often times we will warn someone of our true nature, the beast we fight to keep locked up deep inside out soul.  You should listen, for it may not appear often, but the monster is there, lying in wait.

Saturday, April 21, 2018

Hating the World

Those dark thoughts, those harsh emotions, they can break a person down.  It is a fight to continue forward.  To keep going takes a strength that drains our soul.

Friday, April 20, 2018

Succumbing to the Night

My demons
I can no longer fight.
I've given up,
Succumbed to the night.
I belong to them,
They are in control.
I have lost.
I have no soul.
This is what it feels like when the darkness surrounds us, embraces us, consumes us whole.

Thursday, April 19, 2018

Fake Smile

Most people do not want to see someone who is hurting or in pain... so we fake a smile to make them feel better about themselves.  The pain is still very much real and does not go away.  You can see it in our eyes, if you would only just look.

Wednesday, April 18, 2018

Dying Alone

I've never been afraid of death. More times than not I actually welcome it.  What scares me the most is dying while being alone.

Tuesday, April 17, 2018


Her eyes became the death of me,
for when I looked into them
I fell in a love that can never be.
Sometimes you can fall so madly in love with someone, that when they are gone, so are you.

Monday, April 16, 2018


Why am I broken and so worthless?
Often times, no matter what some one tells us or how good things are going, when we crash, we crash hard and this is how we see ourselves, broken.

Sunday, April 15, 2018

Living with Anxiety

I'm not afraid of Death... its living that scares the shit out of me.
Where most people have a fear of death, those who are suffering through Anxiety are afraid of living. Things that you see as normal scare the ever loving shit out of us. The fight becomes even harder because we know we have to keep moving forward, slowly, one inch at a time, but we do move forward.